How do you write a war story? Telling your build orders and stuff? Or like a fiction? Then let me try a short fiction (just cause i dont have anything better to do) (warning - i learned to write and read english only using the internet, thus dont expect a big vocabulary
)Letme see...
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2v2 player mod
all cards mod
My home city is called Greyhawk, and my explorer is Zoza (my brother nickname, because he sleeps alot, thus ZzzzZZZ, zoza, get it? zoza, zzZZz, get it? hahahaha).
So, there he goes, Sexypanda spanish king and his girlfriend queen Elizabeth (not really) sent a small force to colonize the new world. But since we are capitalistic pigs, we wont help our fine explorers (in my case, i sent my own brother, because he could kill me to become king, soooo...) unless they bring shinning stuff, exotic products and lots of goods that can make us richer.
But ooh nooo, Queen Isabela and her twin sister, Queen Isabela, are both in love with me. But since Lizzy has my hearth (not really), they send each one a colonist force to fornicate and take over the new world! Damn womens! Theres enough sexypanda for them all, dont they see?
After months of sea travel, Zoza the Fine explorer and some workers and dogs, reach New England (a tribute to my girlfriend Lizzy) (no not really) and then they start a town here. Zoza start traveling on that new land, discovering some silver mines, alot of animals and *gasp* natives! They dont have teethbrush (sp??), but somehow their teeths are perfectly white. He tells them he is here to protect the new world from the evil Isabela, so they agree to protect us.. for a cost.
Some bandits are keeping a tomahawk guy tied to a tree! Without asking how did they got in there (since its not like theyre in a new, totally unnexplored continent... oh, wait), Zoza snipes one and shoot the other in the face. The tied native is now his boyfriend! (not really.. i think).
The pet, Zoza's Dog, finds one of Isabel town center, but he dies in there. Sensing a disturbance in the Force, Zoza asks for some soldiers from the new World; I, as the great ruler that i am, agree to send 8 pikemen, 6 rodelero and some better weapons (the damage-upgrade card). Once they get in there (through Fedex), they find already a force of 5 tomahawks, 5 musketteers and 5 pikemen (sons of the original settlers - each couple had about 4 kids, and they all grew up at allarming speed, so Zoza decided to use the spare teenagers in his army). This "army" rushes to Isabel Left Town and - oh the humanity - start killing everyone!
The battle goes well, the town center is destroyed, and lots of innocents die - but what is that - a shipment! Oh nooo! 5 musketteers attack Zoza strike force, as well as 10 settlers who took over guns! And the other Isabel Town just sent 10 musketteers! And theres two outposts being built at modern-machynerry speed very close to the battlefield! Oh noo! The strike force is destroyed! Zoza is captured! Every moment he lives is agony! My sweet brother, noo, i pay the evil ransom and receive a letter from the new world saying that Zoza is stronger now! Wee! About 10 musketters and 10 pikes are trained, as well as 2 outposts are built to protect the trade route, and then the rest of Isabel defenses, from both towns, strike Zozas force, but now he is on defense, with two outposts giving cover! A Victory!
Oh the blood of his enemies and the cries of their wives, Zoza is excited with his victory, theres no time for shipping an entire Fortress! Just send soldiers! Much before he can declare himself in the Fortress Age, Zoza, 10 musketters, 10 pikes, alot of dogs and some natives (fighting in pairs, each couple holding a big wall in front of them?) rush Isabel Left town and burn it down!
Most of Zozas men are soldiers. They want to go back to town center and make babies with their women, but theres no time! Isabel remaining town is growing! Zoza sent me a letter, and i asked Lizzy to help me there, i mean, she got a huge walled city in the new world, stupid women, dont she know the best defense is offense! So i chop her head and take over England! Weeee! Not really, i put another women called New Lizzy in rule of that country, but i do chop lizzys head off. Within weeks, New Lizzy settlers are made soldiers and sent to take Isabel Right town.
About 40 of english archers and musketters die to a large horde of Lancers; Zoza think about a strategy: let them english die, we wait here; his soldiers do not protest. When those horses get tired of crushing english gentlemen, Zoza take over the battlefield with his battlehardened soldiers! Even Pete the Gentle is not spared! Lots of Spanish die here, but many more came from the close and just-built-at-incredible-speed barracks and even from the Old World some strong horsemen are sent! Zoza is not an honored soldier, when those poor settlers came asking for surrender, Zoza sent 8 angry war dogs to eat them! A cannon just ships from the new world, and makes short work of those spammed outposts - why did Isabel asked their settlers to build outposts at the back of her city anyway?
And what about New Lizzy reinforcment and shipped soldiers? They are marching left and Right at Isabel Left Town, the destroyed one! Stupid Women! I think ill kill her and put a men in charge of that Island! Im evil. And sexy.
Zoza finally take the New World, and im much richer now. But i think he dont want to pay taxes anymore. Then ill just raise them again to teach him a lesson!
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Well... What do you think